Anyone still here? Man I never write anymore. I blame laziness and general malaise. What’s really unfortunate is that lately, I feel like I’ve had a ton of good ideas and funny shit to write down but then I remember that the computer is all the way over there ten feet away. That’s a hike. That’s fucking far.

But, I did come up with an idea today and maybe it’s because I am an egomaniacal crazy person (for evidence see this blog) but I think it’s fucking brilliant.

So I was watching Top Chef tonight, alone eating an entire large pizza (what?), thinking of just how ridiculous it’s really become and having all these hilarious thoughts. But, so sad, nobody to share them with. But wait! An idea!

Maybe it’s time for me to join twitter! And so I did. I have used Twitter for one thing and one thing only: finding out when the next Japanese Porn Convention is in Austin. No, I’ve only used to to follow a guy I used to know who is a professional poker player now (he’s good). I don’t really know what it is, and I think the whole thing is kind of stupid.

But, I just had too many funny thoughts tonight to keep them to myself. Unfortunately, I thought of this idea halfway through and I guess it wouldn’t have mattered anyway since I have zero followers (I don’t even really know what that means) until anyone discovers it. So I’ve created an account in which I’m going to watch the shows I watch and tweet (?) throughout to anyone that cares. I guess I’m going to have to find some shows, cause right now all I can think of is Top Chef, and I juuuuuuust might have to start on that stupid design show that follows it because that shit is ridiculous.

Will anyone care? I don’t know. Will anyone read this announcement anyway? I don’t know. Will it be funny? Yes, yes it will. I guess if a tree lands in the forest and nobody is around, does it make a sound? YES. What are you, fucking retarded?

Anyway, my name on twitter is tvsnark (genius, right?) and I’ll probably figure out later what I’m doing other than Top Chef.

For the record, I doubt I’m the only person with this idea. However, as noted above, I am extremely unfamiliar with Twitter so I wouldn’t know. But I’m probably way funnier than anyone else doing the same thing.